6 qualities of a man that you should not indulge

We all like to fall head over heels in love at some point in life. Loving someone is always a nice thing to do. However, loving someone does not mean indulge the person to abuse you, cheat you, or rule you.

Today, I am not going to talk about abuse and cheating as I think that it is an obvious fact and it is better not to waste time talking about something so conspicuous and blunt. You should never tolerate abuse and cheating. There is no second thought to it.

What I would like to talk about today is about 6 traits and habits of a man that you should never accept, indulge, and compromise.

6 qualities of a man that you should not indulge

6 qualities of a man that you should not indulge

A man who never values relationship: 

Have you asked yourself why do you want to have a relationship?  

Why in the first place do you plan to commit yourself to a man ‘forever?’

Let me help you with the common answers:

• To get rid of loneliness
• To get security
• Hmm... Is it citizenship? (I hope it is not!)
• Money?
• Fame?
• To have kids? (For God’s sake!)

Hopefully, all my speculations are wrong. While I do agree that getting emotionally bonded is too high a lofty moral to achieve and we often have our own needs to enter into a relationship; nevertheless it is always good to know the right reason to enter into a relationship with your man.

That’s the first step.

So why do we have a relationship? I ask again.

I hope the reason is to get connected to someone we choose to live in every possible way. Although it is understandable that many of us enter into a relationship without much thinking and it may not always stay connected. There could be a reason like a dependency or in blunt terms taking advantage of someone, milking him out in every possible way to get the best of him. Now for this, I don’t have any other words to say except, abuse.

Run to someone who really wants to stay connected to you. Now, this does not always mean that whoever calls you often to see him or needs you badly all the time is a reliable indicator that he values you and the relationship. There might be other hidden reasons like I said dependency, lack of confidence, needs, and so on.

6 qualities of a man that you should not indulge

So how do we find out if our man values relationships?

The simple way to find this is to take a back step and try to know him objectively without involving many emotions. Now that is a big problem for a woman like me. I simply find it very hard to be out of an emotional state and understand things practically. But this is important and we need to know how to master this art.

Check how does he behave with his family? 

How often does he call them or meet them? 

Remember, a man who is not rooted in his own family cannot stay rooted with you.

Does he take responsibility?

While taking important decisions, does he consult you or take your matters into consideration?

Do the choices that he makes while taking decisions to reflect his concern about your feelings and your preferences?

How do you judge his actions? 

Is it his work first, then his own desires, then his comfort and then you?

Take time and try getting answers to all these questions. Hover around and check the possibility. Do not indulge your emotions to take over your objective thinking.

Has zero moral values:

Who would like to live with a person who has zero sense of morality?

Well, even though the answer is obvious, there are many of us who get so much blinded in love that they fail to have the vision to find out the consequences.

Never accept a man who has no sense of moral value and wisdom. 

Zero moral values

Why?????

It is because a person to lets you get away with things without having any values would eventually fail to value you.

If your man does not have the guts to stand by what is just and right even though it might hurt you or any other person, then he is not a man that you should go back home. He can never be able to be that ideal man for you would be daughter or son whom she or he would always look up to in awe and adoration. Further, you would never value a man eventually in the long run who does not have his backbone straight.

Therefore a man is a perfect man for you if he stands up for the truth. If you go wrong, he should be the first person to stop you. If you think you need a yes man who is always going o say yes to everything you say because he is scared of losing you, then probably you need to check your choice once again. It is not only unhealthy but it is also not accepted.

A man who is always looking for your approval and acceptance even if you are wrong would someday compromise himself as a man. It is very sad to live in such a kind of relationship.

We all need feedback. We need to be told when we go wrong. It teaches us to be a better person and we all would like to evolve and grow in our relationship beautifully. Do not indulge in a relationship with someone who always tries to keep you contended even if you are wrong.

However, this does not mean that I am encouraging your man to criticize you. Criticism is not the same as correcting someone. Criticism brings negative thoughts and pessimist attitudes whereas correcting someone is always positive, healthy, and optimistic.

Lacks courage and strength: 

A man is a man if he has masculine qualities. Strength and courage is indeed one such trait that you need to look for in a man.

By strength, I mean physical as well as mental strength. As women, we sometimes need emotional and mental support from a man. Physical strength is not good enough. Although both are important.

Lack of courage & strength

You should never indulge and compromise with someone who hides behind you whenever you both face any difficult situations. He should rather be a man enough to stand by you and face things with you.

Lacks responsibility:  

Responsibility is something that every man tries to escape. It is not something uncommon. The thing that you need to look for is to find out if your man is able to take responsibility when he needs to act responsibly.

Being born in a patriarchal society we are almost born with the idea that men are the real pillars and strengths of a family. They are the real bread earners and are the shepherd for their flock.

However, when it comes to a real-life scenario we see the opposite.  We find the male population always engrossed and busy in their own web of work like scenario. They believe that family and personal life are the domains of the women who are given less responsibility for managing that domain. In reality, the opposite is true.

Your life is not just an office, boss, and colleagues. Your life is not just about watching streaming videos when you want to be stress-free. Your life is not just your mobile phone, laptops, and gadgets.

Your real life is the balance time that you get post your 9-5 job. Your real life is your family and being responsible for it.

Men often run away from responsibility and commitments. It’s a headache for them. However, when they are into a real relationship they tend to extend their arms of support and unknowingly become responsible for his spouse and children. That’s what I call growing in relationship. Never go for a man who runs away from accountability and responsibility.

Another aspect of responsibility that I would like to talk about is being ready to accept once mistake and fault for any actions or deeds commitment.

Have you seen men who constantly argue and argue till he makes you feel that it was actually your idea, your action that prompted him to do or say certain things?

There are men who would always try to blame it on you, other people, and situations for his own actions and words. Because you said this so I got mad at you and I threw the glass.’ It is not because of someone else, it is because he was not able to control his temper and instincts he behaved in a certain manner.

Accepting and admitting one's actions and deeds is a responsibility. That is manly enough to make a woman feel secure and peaceful.

Do not indulge in a relationship that has no agreeableness and acceptance. It is an irresponsible trademark of an arrogant man who would never value you.

Bad Hygiene: 

If you are with someone who does not give any importance to hygiene and is not ready to accept your honest feedback because he is too egoistic to accept it, or he hardly cares, then it is actually a problem.

Bad Hygiene

Hygiene is the core of good health. Good personal hygiene is absolutely necessary to lead a healthy worry-free protective life.

Would you like to kiss a man having a bad odor?

How about sex with someone who has a bath sometimes when he feels like?

How about unwashed underwear and socks scattered around the floor?

Uhhhhh….. I am sure this is something that would really put you off from any kind of romance and action.   

While I understand that everyone comes from different backgrounds and perhaps not quite aware of the necessities of good hygiene, it is never too late to learn. The problem comes when the other person is not ready to accept the feedback and not ready to change for the better.

Never indulge a man who pays no heed to health and hygiene. Above all, health is the prime concern for all of us. You can even get infected by various communicative diseases resulting due to poor hygiene.

A man having no passion or any kind of masculine traits:

Opposite attracts. We feminine beings get most attracted to men who are like real men. We look forward to a certain kind of masculine traits and qualities, a person with real passion backed with adequate actions.

A man without masculine traits is not a real man

Tell me which women do not dream of being ‘swiped off her feet’ by her favorite hero that she has in her mind since her mills and boons days?

By masculine qualities, I do not restrict myself on physical qualities, though according to me it is also important to be physically appealing if not attractive.

By masculine traits, I would stress more of mental strength and character. It could be honesty, responsibility, moral values, and the ability to take decisions and actions when needed.

A man constantly asking for acceptance and approval having no sense of confidence becomes a burden to a woman even though initially we like mothering this kind of man.

When you have kids, you know what real motherhood means, and at that time you need a real man to support you and your baby to become one strong family unit. There are times when urgent decisions have to be taken. There are times which demand immediate attention and action. Your man should be masculine enough to take that on his shoulder.

So finally, what does it mean by not indulging a man with 6 peculiar qualities?

Let us now be clear what it actually means by not indulging a man with 6 qualities for a relationship.

It does not mean that if you find a man with these 6 qualities all together you should break up with that person right away. My intention to write about these bad qualities is not to prompt you to break up with your partner. Unless of course you already had this idea on your head and you just needed a push.

You might need to think about it more carefully and objectively without getting yourself emotionally charged as emotions often make us do crazy stuff.

You could decide to sit down and talk to your partner about certain things that are bothering you and try working out positive plans that would further make the relationship strong and bonded.

Knowing the basic values and things that you should never compromise always empowers you by creating awareness. Only when you know the dangers you would try to avoid it. My aim for writing this article is to create awareness and give warning signs to people having partnered with similar traits.

Would you like to spare some time in writing your thoughts? I always welcome difference of opinions and new suggestions. Please feel free to write in the comment box as your valuable feedback.

Keep loving & keep sharing,

Cheers,

Happy Parenting!