6 Smart Strategies For Single Parenting - India Parenting Tips - To deal with common parenting issues

Friday, July 19, 2019

6 Smart Strategies For Single Parenting

"So finally, the long-awaited decision was taken! You have finally parted ways. Whether it is circumstance or choice or a test of time, the reality is true. You are Single again. A single parent."

Emily was sitting in the park lost in thought constantly harping over her past asking herself the most ridiculous question, "What went wrong! It was the same park that was once the most romantic place to be in. It was an 8-year-old relationship. Suddenly there was a big noise that made her come to reality. She looked around and could not find her little Sarah who was running around a few minutes back asking her mom to play with her.
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6 Smart Strategies For Single Parenting

Guilty anxious Emily ran around crying out 'Sarah? Sarah! My angel where are you.' 

She ran towards the large commotion to find that little Sarah lying on the ground injured and unconscious! 'It seems that the poor girl was alone all by herself on the swing uttered someone from the big crowd. 'What an irresponsible parent!' said another passerby. The words struck like a piercing arrow or as a big slap to parenting for Emily. 
Hurt, guilty and broken Emily ran to grab her daughter when the little girl opened her eyes and called out Mamma? Are you alright?
Emily felt that she got back to her world. God had mercy and gave her a new chance to be a successful single parent.

From that day Emily developed, planned and implemented new strategies that are the sure-shot success to single parenting.

Here are some smart single parenting strategies that proved 100% successful to implement for real-time Successful results.
Also Read: Parenting Stress | How to Cope With Parenting Stress

6 Smart Strategies For Single Parenting

#1. Acceptance


The first and most important strategy that I could think of is acceptance. Accept yourself as you are. Accept your past. Nothing in life happens without a reason. There must be wisdom behind every hurdle. You don't know. It is a matter of time. Perhaps with time, you would realize the greater behind it. Moreover, remember, nothing lasts forever. Not even this hurt, hurdle, the guilt or this sadness.
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Accept yourself as you are

The best thing you can do is to accept yourself and say Goodbye to all those guilt and sadness. What had to happen has happened and now you are a responsible parent which is your current status.


#2. Realistic

Be realistic when it comes to planning and expectations from yourself as well as from your child. It is not so easy to be a single parent. You end up playing a dual role. A role of a bread earner to ensure that you and your child are financially safe and also to ensure that the upbringing and nurturing of the child is carried on in a safe and friendly environment.

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Be Realistic
Hence realize that you are doing a task that can never be perfect. Stop trying to make everything perfect. There is nothing called a perfect family anyways.

#3. Prioritize

The next best smart strategy for single parenting is to prioritize your needs and sort them based on the demanding situation or circumstances.

Parenting is constant juggling between needs and expectations. You need to realize what task demands immediate attention that you need to work on immediately. Other tasks or needs can always wait for the weekends.
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Prioritize your needs

Example: Attending a PTM (Parent Teachers Meeting) might be a priority while grocery shopping can be done at the weekend. It becomes subjective according to the situation and circumstances. So think smart and act wisely. Break down the tasks and sort them into groups.

  1. Red alert task (Immediate Attention)
  2. Orange alert (Not so urgent but important)
  3. Go Green (Can wait till the next weekend or vacation)

Also Read: Don't be an angry mom | What makes you angry mommy?

#4. Build a Support Team

You are not a Super Hero! Though of course, you are a Super Mom or Dad for your child and you deserve to be. However, realize that you are a single person trying to play multiple roles. There would be mistakes and hurdles. You might need help from people around you. Hence the support team comes as a handy rescue.

List down a list with people whom you can rely on and can reach out when it comes to helping you to accomplish any task. Ensure that the person is trustworthy and helpful.
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Build a support team

After you list the people who can help you out when needed, make sure to contact them and let them know that you might be needing their help for accomplishing certain tasks. It could be arranging your child’s Birthday Party or a weekend trip or babysitting the child for some urgent assignment and so on. Ensure that you communicate and reach out to them so that they are aware of your needs and expectations.

Be vocal and blunt in letting them know what help you need. Do not presume things. It might be possible that they have other plans or priorities that they need to attend.


#5. Reach Out and be Social

One of the main mistakes that often single parents does is to shy away from the limelight or social platform. It could be some social or cultural issue or family pressure or individual lacking self-confidence that often single-parent become almost invisible in the social platform.
While sometimes a little hibernation indeed is needed for self-healing and nurturing, prolong seclusion has its drawbacks. We must remember that we are social beings and we can never stay alone. It is not healthy for the child either. When we stay aloof and away from the crowd it instills a feeling of lacking confidence or hiding some guilt or mistake which is not true.


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Reach out and be social
We need friends. We need people around. Everyone can’t be a Moron.

There are good people around for sure.

Hence never stop socializing. Keep your doors and windows open. Often we bump into great relationships simply without even expecting anything out of it. God is the master planner and He has planned something for you. So never give up and stop living your life.


#6. Nurture and Grow

Living things grow. We all had learned this in our Primary school. So give your self-time, space and environment to grow mentally, emotionally, spiritually so that your spirit gets enlightened. You can find a new world altogether.

Every individual is different. Our likes and dislikes differ. As a single parent, most of the time goes by to meet the challenging demands of parenting. However, do not neglect yourself. If you neglect yourself and stop loving yourself then ultimately it would hamper your peace of mind and consequently hamper your child’s growth and development. Therefore keep loving yourself. Try concentrating on things that you had ignored so long. It could be joining a gym to get in shape or learning a new language or anything that interests you.
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Nurture & Grow

Nothing is impossible in this world. It is always your mind that controls you. Therefore realize the power of positivity and move on in your life. Whether it was a choice or a forced decision, the end outcome is the same. You are a single parent and this is not something new that is happening first time in human history for God’s sake!

What seems to be a big challenge now could seem such a trivial thing in the future. It is just a matter of time and these experiences in life make you a person that you become after you face hurdles in life.

Moreover, it is always better to be single and live peacefully than to live in an unhappy marriage in an unhealthy environment with kids around seeing and learning all the wrong things. Children learn from practical experiences that they see and learn from the social environment. They do not go by words of wisdom. What they see they learn and in turn practice the same.

Trust me! You are fortunate. You have taken a step or forced to take a step to be only for a better future, a better life.



As little Sarah was fast asleep in her cozy bed, her mother Emily closed the reading book and kissed her forehead. Emily is now an entrepreneur of a designer jewelry store. She is a successful businesswoman and a proud mother of a beautiful daughter. She had learned her lesson to stay focused and never give up as a single parent.

Cheers,
Happy Parenting!

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